Self-Love on St Dwynwen’s Day

Today, 25th January, is St. Dwynwen’s Day, colloquially referred to as “Welsh Valentine’s Day.” This day is celebrated primarily in Wales and is a time when lovers exchange cards and other tokens of their affection. St. Dwynwen, after whom the holiday is named, dedicated her life to protecting true love; and yet, she chose to live without it for most of her life. Hers is an evocative story of the joy and fulfilment that women can find in time spent just with ourselves.

Pages Past, by Nom Kinnear King

LOVE LOST

Dwynwen (dooIN-wen) lived in the fourth century, in what is now Brecon Beacons National Park in South Wales. She was one of King Brychan Brycheiniog’s 24 daughters, and by far the loveliest and most spirited. When she met prince Maelon Dafodrill, they fell madly in love. But when Maelon asked King Brychan for Dwynwen’s hands, he was refused; the king had plans to marry Dwynwen to another. Maelon was furious, and he took out his anger on Dwynwen.

What exactly this means is now lost, but Dwynwen fled to the woods, distraught. Here, sources differ. Some say that an angel visited her and gave her a potion that would help her forget Maelon. Others give credit to a wood spirit that visited her in a dream. Either way, Maelon was turned into a block of ice.

But Dwynwen, with her gentle heart, begged God - or the spirit - for three wishes. The first was to release Maelon; the second was to protect all true lovers; the third was that she never marry. Dwynwen then became a nun, travelled Wales, and eventually lived out her days alone on the island of Llanddwyn.

You carry the mountain within you, by Lucy Campbell

A BLESSED LIFE

Despite Dwynwen’s disappointment in love, hers is not a tragic tale. In fact, by all accounts, she lived very happily. Her name even means “she who leads a blessed life.”

Dwynwen’s story resonates across the centuries because of its powerful message about defining oneself outside of love and marriage. Dwynwen easily could have wished for her and Maelon’s happily ever after. Instead, she chooses to travel, build a legacy, and live for herself. She does not disparage love - in fact she protects it - but she decides to live without its restrictions.

In a way, she is the forerunner of other great women who knew the importance of taking space and time away from the family in order to follow their own passions. Virginia Woolf wrote of the necessity of “a room of one’s own” in which women could write. Maya Angelou famously rented herself a hotel room - taking with her only with a legal pad and pen, a bottle of sherry, a deck of cards, Roget’s Thesaurus, and the bible - in order to write in peace.

The Blue Studio, by Wilhelmina Barns-Graham

St. Dwynwen’s Day might be a celebration of romantic love, but through Dwynwen’s story, it is also a reminder of the blessed life women lead when we take space for ourselves and our own pursuits.

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